"Them" and "Us"

So in High School I was a great big nerdy geek accented by the fact that I was in Orchestra AND band and had extremely strict parents who never let me go out except for on the weekends and only if an event were planned umpteen days in advance and everyone who I went out with was known by them. I really had a minimal social life. Nobody knew who I was.

And then there were the popular kids, which pretty much included everyone else, who were not in the category mentioned above.

Basically my class consisted of the "us," the 25 or so like myself, and the "them," the other 525 kids who had a social life.

So what happens when an "us" has to go to a 20-year class reunion meeting with "them" because one of "them" conned the "us" into helping the "them" because the "them" thinks that this "us" has computer skills because this "us" has a blog?

You get this conversation.

Me, "Oh my God. I just realized I'm going to a bar Thursday to meet the popular kids! What in the world do you wear to have drinks with the popular kids? What do popular kids wear?"

Tina, "The Okie my kids go to the right school uniform."

Me, "What's that?"

Tina, "Tight jeans, high heels, and fancy shirt--preferably black."

And you know, she's right. That is the uniform for going out in with the "them" in my part of town.

So, the question now is. Do I conform to a "them" or do I stay an "us?" Or can I still be an "us" if I look like a "them." Or can I be a "them" without having to dress like a "them?" I mean really, this "us" doesn't look so good in jeans these days. Or should this "us" realize that 20 years have passed, and she doesn't really care any more what "them" thinks. And perhaps its time for the "them" to conform to the "us" status because we are just that much more fun aren't we? Or maybe this "us" is thinking too much about this subject, and this "us" needs to get off of the computer and go finish her real work.

And that brings me to a final conversation. Every school year my son, Little B, has a new girl who seems to have a crush on him. Usually it's some girl from the neighborhood, and we'll see her ride by on her bike or drive by with her parents and yell out the window to us in her high pitched excited little girl voice, "Hi Little B!"

This year it's a girl who lives a few doors down, and we were driving by her. Little B says, "Mom, open the window quick. I want to say 'hi'."

Before the window was all the way down the little girl yells, "Hi Little B! I got my hair cut. Do you like it?"

Little B, "No."

From the look on her face you could tell she was crushed.

Big D and me horrified, "Little B! Tell her she looks nice."

Little B, "But she doesn't."

Me, "That doesn't matter."

Little B, "But Mom...she doesn't."

And by this time the little girl has gone off with her friends.

Me to Big D later when the kids aren't around, "So every year Little B has a new girl who has a crush on him. And I think it's because he's nice, or funny, or cute, or charming."

Big D, "Yeah. He wasn't too nice today."

Me with disgust, "I know. You know who he is?"

Big D, "Who?"

Me, "He's the asshole."

And what's an "asshole" in school terms? He's a "them."

How did an "us" raise a "them?"

Perhaps my "them" husband had something to do with it.

Oh, and my "them" husband's response to the "asshole" comment?

Big D (the nice guy "them"), "Great! Maybe he'll do better with the ladies in high school than I did."

Me, "Yeah. Until he gets one of "them" in trouble."

Pause.

Big D, "I'll talk to him."

Me, "Good."

Because this "us" has no idea how to deal with the trials and tribulations of being one of "them." I can't even figure out what to wear for drinks.